Battle: Killed By Covid-19 Cliches

Kevin Battle
May 12, 2020 - 2:25 pm

(Cue the slow, somber tapping of piano keys) 

“I am here to help.”

‘We may be a part right now.  During these trying times.  These challenging times.  During these uncertain times. While things slow down.  Especially now.   Now more than ever.  We will get through this.  Together.  Even though we are apart. We are all in this together.  During this time of social distancing.  We are here for you.  Let’s stop the spread!’

Am I the first person in the current era, these troubling times, to say: ‘Let’s stop the Bulls**t!  Please!?’

I’m sorry.  You may be enjoying the unified show of emotion - in slow motion - in every message and on every commercial.  However, similar to my feelings on being confined to my room for 8 weeks, I am done with it.  I did not commit a crime. 

I’m sorry.  It’s me not you. 

Admittedly, I am not the most ‘touchy-feely’ person on the planet.  Ironically, personal expression can be a bit odd in spite of my public career.  I’m working on that. 

I have been accused of being an ‘emotional cripple.’  

That insult actually brought a smile to my face.  A twinkle to my eye.  A warmness to my chest.  My small heart grew three sizes that day.  (Grinch, please.  Phhbbt.)


But, even the most emotional among us must agree that this sanctimonious show can end.  The fake compassion can stop.  We got the message already.  Thank you, Hollywood. Thank you, New York ad team.  Thank you, coordinated effort. 

We are all, basically, in the same boat despite our various personal loses.  Some have lost more than others, I know.  I honestly and sincerely pray for you every day.  However, others only want to claim to be the most aggrieved.  And, I pity you.  

After ‘red,’ we all have a sentence of the ‘yellow’ phase to get through.  Regardless of the path that got us here. 

Maybe that is the problem. We truly are all in this together.  Maybe that is why I don’t need the message pounded over my head ad nauseam.

If you do need that, I’m sorry. 

Uh-oh.  I hear the music again!  

‘Stay close.  Stay safe.  Stay home.  Stay 6-feet away.’

(Clap your hands)

Thank you.  Have a great day.

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